Friday, April 20, 2012

Everything happens for a reason

An absolutely meaningful universe is just as terrifying as an absurd universe.

This point escapes certain happy followers of the Ovaltine Prophecy, Dr. Wayne Dwyer and The Secret. They affirm that, gosh, everything happens for a reason. See, if some bad stuff happens to you, that's just you doing it to you to jumpstart spiritual growth. Or God. Same difference. And, if you really look at it, the "bad" stuff isn't really bad. It's all good! It's all part of the plan!

OK. If you take this stuff literally .... God (or You) at the dawn of time scripted the Charlie Manson murders for the spiritual growth of Sharon Tate and friends once they hit the next level. That fork in Sharon Tate's stomach? Plan. Adam Walsh's mother turns her head for a second in a convenience store. Some sickwad grabs her son, does unspeakable stuff to him, then cuts off his head. Well, that was part of the plan too. Pakistani men throwing acid in the faces of Pakistani women? More plan. And, if a psycho killer slaps a Chloroform-soaked cloth over your face and proceeds to torture you to death for several hours with a grapefruit spoon, you can console yourself with the fact that, yes, that's part of the plan, too!

Personally speaking, the randomness and meaninglessness implied in the assertion that, "Shit just happens" is sounding better and better.

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