There are times I suspect this is a joke universe.
The evidence is overwhelming.
Take names. Names are too fucking close to the money if you ask me. Like some 18th century novel with characters like Craven Pridewell or sumpin.
The guy who brings us glee is Jackie Gleason. The woman who tripped up Clinton was Linda Tripp. Ross Perot is an anagram of "sore sport." And, of course...
The kid everybody's making a fuss about is Elian Gonzales.
Elian being an anagram of "alien," natch.
If somebody handed me that in a story I'd say Come on...Just too damn obvious, dontcha think?
...and hand it back for a rewrite.